Getting Skinny vs Getting Confident

This is definitely a hot topic amongst my friends. Not because we all want to be super skinny and are always complaining about our weight, almost none of us do that. Of course there are some that have been on and off about their body image, but who doesn't have self confidence issues every once in a while. With summer, prom, graduation, and the big move right around the corner I have been thinking a lot about loosing weight. I usually don't think about it that much because I'm usually worrying about other things plus that's not really something I've always stressed over. Not saying I'm skinny or anything, I'm definitely not, I've got more of those Latina thighs and ass genes, but I'm not overweight.

Anyway the point is sometimes I do work out and I don't want to brag about it which I'm not doing but sometimes I feel like if I mention it, it brings up this whole topic about how everyone complains about their body and how they're "sooo fat". Like this one girl I know who is super skinny and makes it a thing to bring up how she feels huge and that she needs to lose weight. She says it right in the middle of class all the time, in the hallway, it's impossible not to hear her. I just want people to know I NEVER WANT TO BE LIKE THAT. Basically I'm scared to ever bring up the fact that I've been working out because I don't want to risk sounding like this girl, not that I usually need to bring it up. I just feel bad that I feel this way.

I think this idea might have to do with the fact that I tell myself that I want to get healthy and feel confident but then another part of me says, shouldn't you feel confident in your own body? I mean that's what people tell you all the time right? Then for some odd reason I start to feel bad for working out and not feeling completely happy with my body. I'd love to be able to walk down the beach or by the pool in my bikini without feeling like I have to put my arms around my stomach and cover everything up, so automatically I think, "Well if I lost a couple of pounds I'd feel a lot better." I don't exactly know, I want to feel strong and confident and look amazing but I also want to make sure I'm not going about this the wrong way.

Either way I'm going to continue on my road to loosing weight for summer. It's not like I have much to worry about for school so I'm really going to use my time wisely (for once). Oh and sorry I might start blogging about this more because I want to keep myself focused and I don't want to have to complain to my friends about taking away the Ho Hos, Oreos, and cheesecake too much. Damn you beautiful desserts.

Oh and BTW these are tags I never imagined using on this blog. :P

Hello...Anyone Out There?

Hey people of the internet. So I have no idea if you're actually reading this stuff or if you just find it by accident and then leave...yeah. I would be eternally grateful if you left comments because I would like to know what you think so I can improve the blog. I also just kinda want to know what kind of people are reading this, just because it would be fun.

Thanks, I hope someone out there reads this and comments, even if it's just hi :)

Here's a picture of a kitty:

Midnight Showing of The Avengers YOLO

Dear God The Avengers was so amazing, explosion of everything including my ovaries. The first like 15 min me legs were shaking literally shaking from all the anticipation.

First off I would like to mention what I ship:
Potts and Tony
Black Widow and Hawkeye
Then I might have begun to ship Tony and Capt. America

I can explain. OK at first I thought it was just wrong because they're so damn sexy. I'm not homophobic or anything it's just TONY AND CAPTAIN AMERICA like why? But then I watched the movie and I was like...suddenly I see (yes I did sing that in my head). It was just there, when they were fighting, especially when Tony would make fun of him. I was like, yes.

So I watched the movie at midnight the first night it was out. Tuesday after school I had to do a lot of convincing along with my sister so that my mom would pick us up from the mall at like 3 a.m. I am eternally grateful to my mom for that :) I have been waiting for that movie for SO LONG. We even got the cups with the little figures of The Avengers on the top. I got Thor, my sister got Iron Man, and Gavi got Capt. America.

I don't want to give any spoilers but I loved all the stories in the movie coming together. I would have loved to see more of Capt. America but I heard there's more in the DVD about him, deleted scenes and stuff so I'm definitely getting that in Blu-Ray. Then at the beginning I was really worried that Loki would show up and all I would think of is Tom Hiddleston all nice and gentlemanly because he was afraid he wouldn't be evil enough. But by the end of that movie I just wanted him to die...I mean that as a compliment, but I mean it's not like Tom Hiddleston himself would ever read that, but if for some reason he was please take that as a compliment (I would probably die if I found out Tom Hiddleston was actually reading my lowly little blog). Like he was so bad that I just wanted him to die and the Avengers to win. So basically what I mean is that Tom Hiddleston did an excellent job at being the villain, he was so good I started to hate Loki too...and yet I still find him so damn seductive. That's another thing, my friends don't understand my Loki obsession at all (I hate using the word obsession btw I just really really like him, it's the word they chose to use), none of them. The entire movie they were making fun of me and completely dissing him. I just shook it off, it's kinda funny, plus I see it as less competition. Haha as if I had a shot with the real guy.

There will probably be more posts about this movie because I can't remember everything right now and as usual I'm blogging at school.

Oh one more thing TONY DIES.

Update

Less than a month until I graduate high school, sometimes I have to tell myself that to really believe it. But this post isn't necessarily about me graduating or how pissed off I am about the fact that our senior class hasn't done a prank or a skip day. I should be working on English right now but I have time to work on that later. I don't exactly remember why I decided to write today but when I was walking to the library I felt like writing out my thoughts might help me think clearly about what I should add to my essay.

Right now I'm anticipating watching The Avengers, which should come out tomorrow here. I keep checking the website for the movie theater to try and find out what the times will be but they don't have anything yet. Ok I just checked again and it says the only theaters showing the movie tomorrow are further away than my parents would take me. I hate not being able to drive in this country. WAIT, they're showing it at the second closest mall!! YES :D

Moving on, I've been watching Wallander a lot lately, I usually watch an episode every afternoon when I get home. I must admit the only reason I started watching it is because Tom Hiddleston is in it, I'm glad it's a good show because I might've stopped watching if it wasn't. He doesn't make that many appearances on the show, at least not as many as he has in this other show called Suburban Shootout, that one is weird. Really weird, and kinda stupid. Again I only started watching because he's in it, I know that's really lame and stalker-ish but I wanted to see him act some more. I've gotten really into acting lately, not me acting because there's nothing going on at school, but watching people act. I don't want to criticize anything yet though, I'll just tell you that I like Wallander even though it gets a little depressing watching people die and solving the mysteries surrounding their deaths. Suburban Shootout I don't entirely understand the only way I can really explain it is like mafia housewives? They have these two groups like the good wives and the bad ones and they keep crime out of their little town. I'm sorry my description sucks, basically it's a really strange story about housewives who shoot at each other.

The other show I started watching is Sherlock, it's British like all the other shows I've mentioned in this post. I really love this one so far, and I've only watched one episode. Well one episode is like an hour and a half, I don't really understand why. Anyways it's really good, I think the actor that plays Sherlock does an amazing job. I don't have time to go into detail or anything but if you have time and you like mystery check it out.